scary

What would happen to us?  This week a family at church lost the father in a car accident.  For me those kind of moments cause me to examine what would happen to the kids and I if something if Nathan died in a car accident.  I am not educated I would have to go back to school.  I am not employed I would have to get a job.  We do not have saving...I would have to beg my parents for a place to move home and likely sell most of our possession in order for that to be an option since my parents house is full of possessions already.  I guess that would take care of some moving expenses???  Then my mind wondered to what would happen if we had more children...wow this will be harder!  Then of course my mind wonders to what happens if I die...where do my husband and kids go???  Do they stay here?  Does Nathan try and remain a working dad at the Country Club, or does he move to Springfield and get to know his family better?  Does he move to Kansas City and use my huge family as the large resource they could be?  So many questions and no answers...